mrs2be.ie

[Shivers]

Big fat no!

My mam & her husband are broke, my dad will probably give €500 in a card on the day as thats what all my siblings got, H2B's dad is broke and his mam gave us €1000 but our car had fubar syndrome so we had to use it to pay for that.

Trying to get as many deals as I can to keep costs down but will probably cost around €17k. Will save as much as possible and get a small loan for the rest.

[livingabroad]

I'm very lucky to be in a position where I can be spoilt. H2B and I want to pay for bits ourselves and we have, but my parents are insisting that they pay for hotel, meal etc. it took a long time to get them to sit down and actually say it thought, anytime I was budgeting and cutting things out for being too expensive they kept saying not to be ridiculous and they would pay. I eventually forced them into a room to sit down and discuss what each of us pay. H2B's parents dont have much money so they have offered some money that will mostly cover the band. I was worried that my parents would take over if they were paying but its been very civilized! They really didn't want us to have a loan and start life in debt and living in the UK means we have high rent and less disposable money than if we were at home. We've covered all deposits, dresses, bridal party clothes, makeup, hair etc honeymoon ourselves. We then left my parents as the names on the invites. TBH my parents said they would have been very offended if we hadn't accepted their help, they are old fashioned and they said that its their duty to take care of their daughters wedding and give her a good send-off. If I didn't know better i'd think they were saying goodbye to me forever the way they were talking! I'm the baby of 6 married girls so they also felt that they must pay for me since the rest of family were paid for.

If your parents can afford to help and are willing to do so then I think you should take them up on it. Mine would have been offended, in a way its a little bit of pride for them to throw a party for their little girls!

[waterplily]

That's a no for us as well. My parents can just about afford to feed themselves and keep transport on the road without the cost of my wedding. After all the hassle with H2b's parents I wouldn't ask them for penny

We believe our wedding will come in about £/E10-12k. H2b and I are splitting it down the middle between us. Having already saved a bit after moving in with h2b a year ago I'll be able to afford my half of the wedding cost - just. I'm very lucky because I have a job that pays a reasonable wage and as a result allows me to save. I haven't a clue what H2b earns (don't care as long as he tells me if we're in trouble), but I know it's way more than me. I'm budgeting our wedding in a way that I can afford it though. My parents are saying they'll pay for the cake or cars or other things, but I keep telling them that there's no need because it's all under control. I really love that they want to, but I just know they need it more for themselves. As for H2b's parents - as long as they turn up, that'll do me - otherwise they'll ruin the whole day for him.

[mayb2b]

My mam bought me my dress and the future PIL are contributing towards the reception...however what I didnt reaalise at the time was that there wer T's and C's attached...Our guest list is now twice the size it was since MIL has added all her neighbours and friends etc.....I wish I had said no in the beginning!

[fionab1385]

Oh that's a balls. My parents tried that trick on me to but I told them they could have their brothers & sisters plus 2 friends & their partners each so hopefully they won't push it any more when I go to write the invitations in October!

[muckypup]

wow this is an old thread lol got new notification for it and im like what when did i write that ha ha

[Mrs H 2013]

We are paying for our entire wedding ourselves.... my parents are barely surviving and his parents wouldnt offer ... not that i would take it to be honest !! Myself and h2b are splitting everything right down the middle ... i might pay for the girls presents myself .... we are trying to keep it low as possible ........ Mam wanted to buy my wedding dress but i declined as she can not afford it !!!

[Princess13]

We are paying for everything ourselves, we are lucky we have most of it saved already it is tight but we have another 7 months to go, even if our parents offered I don't think I would accept it as we would prefer them to keep the money for themselves!!

[micls]

We're paying ourselves.

Neither parents would be in a position to help. Feeling guilty enough as they're travelling to Thailand for the wedding, so we've told them we don't want gifts.

[Soph11]

We have been extremely lucky, where by my parents are helping with everything. Nothing we could say would change there mind, that was just the way it was going to be. We are overwhelmed by there generosity.

When we were doing the invits though, we mentioned both set of parents to show a sence of unity between the two families. Its clear that my parents are looking after things but it shows a joining of two families which we love.