mrs2be.ie

[TanyaBranning]

Okay BM is being very difficult, one fab, one have to be chased, one totally uncooperative, I had a small rant last week about her.

As a huge favour to me, my dress maker can see her on a weekend she is home and on a weekend day that she never normally sees people on. I am eternally grateful. I have no idea of a time yet, but it could well be after 5pm, as she has a family, and I know how busy weekend can be. BM has said she'll do 12-3 any time in that time frame. I said okay but if there's a clash of times on that date, I am not sure what to do as she's already putting herself out to see her on a weekend and also too close to the wedding. She told me my dressmaker would hardly want to see people of an evening, and she is going out!!!!

I haven't got back to her yet, but in the meantime she sent me a text to say it's a very important night out with people who are important to her and she isn't changing it. I never asked her to, this will take 15 mins max to measure her up and sort what needs doing. I'm sure dressmaker wouldn't want to see her after 6pm anyway, but no her window is 12-3. Her attitude totally sucks. I know what I want to reply to her, but I have to be related to her after the weddign and her entire family so really do not want WW3 to start. Plus this is a lovely time and I'm refusing to get totally frazzled.

Dressmaker has offered to deal with her, saying she'll take no nonsense and will give her a few home truths. I think she'll be too heavy handed, my h2b says leave her at her! One thing I do know for sure, I totally do not want her as part of my day now, but we are too far gone I think with only 7 weeks to go. And am not able for the family fall out.

[Lainseybainsey]

Dressmaker has offered to deal with her, saying she'll take no nonsense and will give her a few home truths. I think she'll be too heavy handed, my h2b says leave her at her! One thing I do know for sure, I totally do not want her as part of my day now, but we are too far gone I think with only 7 weeks to go. And am not able for the family fall out.

have to say I agree with the hubby, if the dressmaker wants to be the "bad guy" in this......let her. You really don't need the stress. Deep breaths and remeber just seven weeks til you are

[azriel]

Tanya, I totally agree with H2b! I was saying it to myself as I read your post! Pass on the dressmaker's number to her. Some people are ruder to people they know. And more considerate of strangers. I would say when the dressmaker speaks to her she might realise what a cow she is being.
And I would tell the dress maker not to be so careful with the pins!!!!

[waterplily]

with the above as well. Let the dressmaker tell her off seeing as she's getting inconvenienced as well and is in a great position to point it out. Love the pins idea too, but that's just me being naughty.

[Lainseybainsey]

And I would tell the dress maker not to be so careful with the pins!!!!

Love it!!!!! That would be so funny......evil but so so funny!!!

[TanyaBranning]

If i got a hold of her now, I'd let rip I think, so I'm sitting on my hands so as not to call/text/mail her. I think I will let DM deal with her, but I am going to let her know how disappointed I am in her.

[awhiletogo]

I agree with ur H2B and the other girls too, let the dressmaker at her! They're prob well used to stroppy bm's so would prob be well able for her! Also i think if the dressmaker can't make her time window and even after speaking to the dressmaker she won't budge, i'd use that as a way to get rid of her out of the wedding, i.e. i would say "i'm really sorry, but the dressmaker can't do anything else to accomodate you, so if you really can't meet her, maybe it would be best if you didn't be a bm, as the dress needs to be finished and time is getting very short" or something. Now obv i don;t know how that would leave you as regards numbers with groomsmen etc, but i'd rather have an uneven number than be dealing with her! I'd say tho the dressmaker will sort her out! good luck!

[winterbride]

Tanya, I totally agree with H2b! I was saying it to myself as I read your post! Pass on the dressmaker's number to her. Some people are ruder to people they know. And more considerate of strangers. I would say when the dressmaker speaks to her she might realise what a cow she is being.
And I would tell the dress maker not to be so careful with the pins!!!!

LOL i totally agree i would defo get the dressmaker to ring her and i would put money on it she wont say no to her

[TanyaBranning]

I agree with ur H2B and the other girls too, let the dressmaker at her! They're prob well used to stroppy bm's so would prob be well able for her! Also i think if the dressmaker can't make her time window and even after speaking to the dressmaker she won't budge, i'd use that as a way to get rid of her out of the wedding, i.e. i would say "i'm really sorry, but the dressmaker can't do anything else to accomodate you, so if you really can't meet her, maybe it would be best if you didn't be a bm, as the dress needs to be finished and time is getting very short" or something. Now obv i don;t know how that would leave you as regards numbers with groomsmen etc, but i'd rather have an uneven number than be dealing with her! I'd say tho the dressmaker will sort her out! good luck!

I don't really care about uneven numbers at all. If she can't agree a time with dressmaker on that day, her dress won't be getting done at all. I'd say she'd like me to hand it over to her but the dress would be unrecognisable when I get it back! She likes the dress though she'd like to change a few things about the shape of it, straight rather than a-line etc. Her mother (my sil2b) doesn't like it! She's never seen it but AFTER I purchased the dresses and they were away in storage in my mams and she knew it was all done and dusted - we went for a visit one night and she pulled out some photos of dresses in navy that she liked and thought I should buy those instead!

[Lainseybainsey]

Her mother (my sil2b) doesn't like it! She's never seen it but AFTER I purchased the dresses and they were away in storage in my mams and she knew it was all done and dusted - we went for a visit one night and she pulled out some photos of dresses in navy that she liked and thought I should buy those instead!

Wagon!!! How have you not lost the plot with her at all? i would have been like

Thankfully my BM's are a piece of pie (now) at the start though, one of them was I won't wear this and I won't wear that and i just said to her....look, your job on the day is to make me happy (pretty much) and your job is to wear what i buy for you. I sent her on the link from here about the duties of a bridesmaid and she phoned me the next day and said she would wear a plastic bag in my colour scheme if it was what I wanted.

[TanyaBranning]

I know, it's just when the wedding DAY is over I still have to be related to them.

[fionab1385]

Ah Tayna so sorry to hear you are having to put up with this shite!!! I agree though with your H2B, let the dressmaker play the badie in this one - get her to poke some sense into her with a load of pins too !!!! It's a pain when it's family too cuz you really have to bite your tongue don't you? My two sisters are my bridesmaids and I have no tongue left!!!!!!!!

[TanyaBranning]

It's the dressmaker can deal with her now, I've had enough. I sent her an e.mail yesterday saying she will probably see her early in the day but would she be prepared to be flexible if it had to be early evening as it was a favour. That is all I was asking, 15 mins half an hour tops out of her day. I only wanted reassurance that she would play ball if it had to be outside of her time limits.

But I got a reply from her basically saying I was a stresshead and a bridezilla and what's my problem, she is free in the day. It totaly went over her head that I only wanted peace of mind that she'd cooperate if BY CHANCE there was a clash of times. It's dressmaker's baby now, let's wait for the fireworks

[awhiletogo]

YOU'RE A BRIDESZILLA?! You and the dressmaker have gone out of your way to accomodate her!
I hope the dressmaker doesn't hold back in any way, either verbally or with her pins!!

[tandybo]

She is been sooooooooooo unfair, it should be an honour to be part of your BIG day.
One thing I will say.....I have had 2 friends that had BM that they decided they didnt want but didnt have the heart to say and now they hate lookin at their wedding albums cos of the 'mug' starring back at them. I understand that you dont want to cause WW3 so maybe let the MOH deal with her